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Don't blame me, I voted for Alex Sink.
1. Hahahahahahahahahahaha ohgod. Rick Scott declared we need a west coast counterpart to Florida Institute of Technology and so now we're creating Florida Polytechnic, but he's still making sure the education budget gets slashed by 30% and oh yeah, UF is increasing football and cutting the computer science program. I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT FLORIDA, WHY DO I LOVE IT? Oh right because I believe that my vote may one day make a difference and something something hope for the best, cope with the worst.
2. I have been amazingly productive in the five hours I've been awake since my midnight nap. I'm not sure it's going to be enough, but I did just finish my methods essay and I didn't think it was actually going to get FINISHED, I thought I was just going to have to leave in the really bad bits of my "I wrote this while having an anxiety attack" draft to make word count. I am therefore taking a well-deserved break to update this shit.
3. "We're a better team." "I can't believe the NHL lets them give out rats." "Theodore got lucky." OH PARISE AND BRODEUR, STAY SHITHEADS. See you when you come down to Florida for some great golf! I expect you'll be in Doral? It's lovely this time of year, just don't wander too far west or a swamp cat might get you. "Warning, Panther crossing" is not just a sign that APPARENTLY needs to be on your trapezoid, Marty. It's a warning to be careful in the swamp. THE FLORIDA PANTHERS WILL EAT YOU. Small p. That's hard to distinguish in capslock. OH WELL.
4. Woke up at 2:30, flipped to NHL.com to see if the Canucks were in it, and got slammed with a picture of Mike Richards checking David Booth. DO YOU KNOW THAT IS A THING THAT HAUNTS MY NIGHTMARES? No, seriously, I had a nightmare the other night where that hit happened all over again and the Sedins just stood there and didn't stand up for Booth because who cares about Booth? Anyway, then I watched the end of that game and Booth's head was hanging so low and he was so dejected and I felt so bad for him because six months ago, when the trade was made and he'd stopped crying, no one thought his season would end before Sammy and Sturm's (unless he got hit in the head again or something).
5. The Rampage might sweep the baby Canucks tonight! Duco has been tweeting about reverse sweeps, but he also claims they were watching the Canucks game last night for inspiration, so I'm excited about that. I hope he has to buy all his ex-teammates dinner when he loses miserable to the face of greatness that is Jacob Markstrom's goaltending. After this, I think we're coming for OKC, assuming 2 beats 7. I don't even know who 2 and 7 are, whatever. SUCKS TO BE YOU, BABY OILERS! THE BABY CATS WILL GET YOU EVERY TIME. And then the Calder Cup will be ours!!! How can we lose to some eastern fools with Keith Seabrook on our side? ...oh, wait. Forget I asked that.
6. We're apparently meeting at a pub as soon as everyone hands in their essays at noon. I love British pub culture, but when I say "we," I mean "the rest of the medievalists." I am crawling into bed with my Kindle Fire, popping over to AO3 and reading the shit out of the lady NHLers fic that people have been posting but I CAN'T READ YET, BECAUSE I NEED TO WORK, and then going to sleep. And then dinner in hall with A because she's very worried that I'm going to starve to death because I've been working through meals. FOOD AND SLEEP ARE FOR THE WEAK.
7. Sanity returns tomorrow. I am sure you're all looking forward to it. Sanity will then depart at midnight local time because game six, but you should be able to get a whole sixteen hours of me being rational and possibly a post about Garrett Wilson and how in love he and Andrew Shaw are, because now that you people are actually aware of and in love with Shaw, you need to know about his first love. Who was everyone's favorite prospect, but now I think most people are more excited about even Trocheck, which, I was the loneliest Trocheck fan for like six months until Wilson started to SUCK and people began realizing how perfect Troch is (other than the whole growing up a Pens fan, but they can't all be Logan Shaw!) ...okay, maybe sanity won't return. WHATEVER. You wouldn't know what to do if I wasn't posting disjointed rambles about the obsession of the week. You'd be worried someone was wearing me as a skinsuit.
2. I have been amazingly productive in the five hours I've been awake since my midnight nap. I'm not sure it's going to be enough, but I did just finish my methods essay and I didn't think it was actually going to get FINISHED, I thought I was just going to have to leave in the really bad bits of my "I wrote this while having an anxiety attack" draft to make word count. I am therefore taking a well-deserved break to update this shit.
3. "We're a better team." "I can't believe the NHL lets them give out rats." "Theodore got lucky." OH PARISE AND BRODEUR, STAY SHITHEADS. See you when you come down to Florida for some great golf! I expect you'll be in Doral? It's lovely this time of year, just don't wander too far west or a swamp cat might get you. "Warning, Panther crossing" is not just a sign that APPARENTLY needs to be on your trapezoid, Marty. It's a warning to be careful in the swamp. THE FLORIDA PANTHERS WILL EAT YOU. Small p. That's hard to distinguish in capslock. OH WELL.
4. Woke up at 2:30, flipped to NHL.com to see if the Canucks were in it, and got slammed with a picture of Mike Richards checking David Booth. DO YOU KNOW THAT IS A THING THAT HAUNTS MY NIGHTMARES? No, seriously, I had a nightmare the other night where that hit happened all over again and the Sedins just stood there and didn't stand up for Booth because who cares about Booth? Anyway, then I watched the end of that game and Booth's head was hanging so low and he was so dejected and I felt so bad for him because six months ago, when the trade was made and he'd stopped crying, no one thought his season would end before Sammy and Sturm's (unless he got hit in the head again or something).
5. The Rampage might sweep the baby Canucks tonight! Duco has been tweeting about reverse sweeps, but he also claims they were watching the Canucks game last night for inspiration, so I'm excited about that. I hope he has to buy all his ex-teammates dinner when he loses miserable to the face of greatness that is Jacob Markstrom's goaltending. After this, I think we're coming for OKC, assuming 2 beats 7. I don't even know who 2 and 7 are, whatever. SUCKS TO BE YOU, BABY OILERS! THE BABY CATS WILL GET YOU EVERY TIME. And then the Calder Cup will be ours!!! How can we lose to some eastern fools with Keith Seabrook on our side? ...oh, wait. Forget I asked that.
6. We're apparently meeting at a pub as soon as everyone hands in their essays at noon. I love British pub culture, but when I say "we," I mean "the rest of the medievalists." I am crawling into bed with my Kindle Fire, popping over to AO3 and reading the shit out of the lady NHLers fic that people have been posting but I CAN'T READ YET, BECAUSE I NEED TO WORK, and then going to sleep. And then dinner in hall with A because she's very worried that I'm going to starve to death because I've been working through meals. FOOD AND SLEEP ARE FOR THE WEAK.
7. Sanity returns tomorrow. I am sure you're all looking forward to it. Sanity will then depart at midnight local time because game six, but you should be able to get a whole sixteen hours of me being rational and possibly a post about Garrett Wilson and how in love he and Andrew Shaw are, because now that you people are actually aware of and in love with Shaw, you need to know about his first love. Who was everyone's favorite prospect, but now I think most people are more excited about even Trocheck, which, I was the loneliest Trocheck fan for like six months until Wilson started to SUCK and people began realizing how perfect Troch is (other than the whole growing up a Pens fan, but they can't all be Logan Shaw!) ...okay, maybe sanity won't return. WHATEVER. You wouldn't know what to do if I wasn't posting disjointed rambles about the obsession of the week. You'd be worried someone was wearing me as a skinsuit.